NFL Guide

Author: Thanks, everyone, for coming to celebrate my best selling due to my Pulitzer Prize-winning first novel. You will all have the chance to meet me as I sign my book for you, so no pushing please. And ladies, I am sorry, you know I'm not available. But Brad Pitt, who will I play in the upcoming Showtime movie about my life, now that Ms. Jolie has left after he warned against adoption of a baby 26.

The officer called the writer's first customer for an autograph. ) Sorry.

Jill LegFu?

Author: Look, ma'am, I'm sorry, but it is a long line, let me just have this situation and go. What was your name?

Jill is Jill. I used to come to your games of softball - mostly, I was a fan just your team!

Author: I'm sorry, I know that many people at the time. But I'm gone.

Agent Jill ushers and later cycles of the author through many adoring fans, signing and signing until his arm is about to fall. Then a tall man with a white beard and a cane walks to the podium.)

Santa: Well anyway, the point is that the future is supposed to scare you into changing your habits.

Bill: How?

Santa: Because you've become a rich snob who has forgotten all his friends.

Bill: Not all. I remembered the good.

Santa: But not those who read your blog. Not those who make you laugh by making fun of your other friends. Not those who are used to give you all their money in Fantasy leagues until you start to lose and began to act like you're too important for sports imagination.

Bill: But I was rich. And famous. Brad Pitt to play me in a Freakin 'movie!

Father Christmas is only for Showtime....

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